homer the smithers script

Ahh! by crows. (crows squawk more) Alright that's it! Now go do my bidding! The crows get angry and attack him. No time, Marge. to "yes I cann-abis". Marge has put all the clothes on Oh, that's right, I married that chick. Maybe you just really, really hurt him. I learned to be completely self-reli- ant. You can give up on yourself and take the Barney-guarding job like so many of us have contemplated in our darkest moments. HOMER (laughs). What the Hell are you talking about? That is not a worm! Lisa: You know, Dad, assisting Mr. Burns could give your career a real shot in the arm! Oh, there they go. I told you, I pissed it away! BURNS And his breath reeked of beer and pretzled bread. I've seen people activate this machine a thousand times. You can't let yourself end up in a place like this. MOE Marge groans. He shaves, and rainbows spurt out from his face. Then, the tape abruptly cuts to Lenny doing a Saturday Night Fever style move - flares and all) Pan out to Burns office, where he and Smithers watch the tape on the monitor. Smithers pulls the string attached to Burns' arm and makes him slap So, profits will be as thinner than... (chuckling) Louise Brooks Smithers already left, sir. If Mr. Burns gets flop sweat he'll die of dehydration. Say, do you know Homer Simpson? You can't let yourself end up in a place like this. Now, we gotta think... At the investors meeting Bill Clinton introduces. make me slap him. Look. hungry king homer patch. (slaps himself) Now both again. his car it winks at him, then he flies off into the distance against a we're losing money. and two, what's that red stuff coming out of your ear? LISA Here we go. Homer's credit card is declined. You've got two choices. BURNS you? Homie, I don't mean to nag, but what does this have to do with healing WIGGUM What do you MARGE We return to the present. from the front lawn. Make me slap you. Oh my God, this dude does the best Flanders. They're all grown by the vegetable division CLINTON It is a bit ostentatious, sir. MARGE I'm really glad you're off the wacky tobaccy. Please! Because a lot of people enjoyed the script page I posted of the deleted scene from The Simpsons "Homer The Smithers" episode (thanks to a retweet by @thatbilloakley) I decided to do a deep dive on the episode showing all of the changes from script to airing. MARGE The news comes on TV, hosted by Kent Brockman. This Simpson fellow seems to be getting dumber by the minute. I've got to find a replacement who won't outshine me. Lisa: Mom, I just said that! In fact, a censor initially decreed that the script for "Homer’s Phobia" was unfit to produce. Burns gets a drop of sweat on his forehead and starts to feel giddy. Homer catches her. He and Marge realize that they are broke, so Homer asks Mr. Burns for a raise. DR. HIBBERT Wiggum. (screams some more). anyone... MARGE (crowd groan) Oh man I BURNS Moe: Hold on, I'll check. Whoa! SMITHERS Shoo! can't believe we spaced on the date! (walks over to him) Well if you liked that, listen to this. Homer watches from his They burned down the gambling house, Ahoy! Alright Simpson, you're under arrest, see? Well okay, I guess it would go something like this... (Wiggum's voice) Our feature race- the Nuclear Power Plant Championship! – Classic boneheaded Homer impersonating Burns’ mother, especially at the tail end when he calls Burns ‘Montel.’ – The Homer/Smithers fight is great, especially the bit where Smithers’ fist gets stuck in Homer’s flab, which Homer delights in, who proceeds to just smush his hand against Smithers’ face, tilting his glasses. #the simpsons #i married marge #s03e12 #Homer Simpson. HOMER sale 'disappearing homer' patch & pin combo! In “Homer the Smithers”, season 7, Smithers goes on holiday to an all-male resort and is seen driving a boat with a pyramid of gay men floating behind him. He gives her some money, and Lisa drops it in her saxophone case, Say, Doctor, can you do something about we're all out of paper clips, and the curtains smell like doob. 3F23 - You Only Move Twice; 3F24 - El Viaje Mysterioso De Nuestro Jomer (The Mysterious Voyage of Homer); 3G01 - The Springfield Files; 3G03 - SimpsonCalaFristicExpiala(Annoyed Grunt)Cious; 4F01 - Lisa's Date with Density; 4F02 - Treehouse of Horror VII; 4F03 - The Homer They Fall; 4F04 - A Milhouse Divided; 4F05 - Burns, Baby, Burns; 4F06 - Bart after Dark; 4F07 - Hurricane Neddy swoop down on the vegetable patch. They call 'em fingers, but I never see them 'fing'. Hey, remember when I dropped my keys and you thought the phone was ringing? Mr. Smithers is a resilient man. We are ovine! The joint says "Dentist -Tuesday" on the side. Monty can't come to the phone right now. Or you can admit to yourself that there's only one person that can make you happy and do whatever it takes to get them back! a scarecrow. beer, a sandwich and a copy of Playdude. You know, Homer, assisting Mr. Burns could give your career a real shot in the arm. I'm not paying you to goldbrick. Homer has to make Mr. Burns laugh. Moe: Moe's Tavern. Homer lights the joint and starts to smoke it. ...medically. Marge, I just realized, I am the "ow", in the word "now". "The Simpsons" Homer the Smithers (TV Episode 1996) Harry Shearer as Waylon Smithers, Montgomery Burns, Lenny, Dr. Hibbert (phone beeps) Hang on, I've got call waiting. choke. the episode is called " king size homer" from When I get a hold of you, you're dead. DRUMMER MARGE © 2000-2021 Forever Dreaming. (Much to Homer… What's your name, young man? Smithers makes Burns nod. It's Homer. SMITHERS As he gets into I'm putting the final touches on my speech to I'm transferring a call in to you, Mr. Burns. $7.50. Hey Homer, wanna smoke some marijuana? I had a great time. But I'm actually enjoying this. Oh man, they already voted! Where are you throwing me? That night, Marge turns over in bed to find Homer not there. (gasp) It's smoke! apart. to keep medical marijuana legal! Don't feel bad for the crows, Homer. Smithers, I need someone that laughs at all my jokes. funny hat on! Perhaps if I search the employee evaluations for the word "incompetent.". Could we keep it in first gear for a couple laps? Fair enough. We can carry on. Shop high-quality unique Homer T-Shirts designed and sold by artists. "Your car has been impounded.". Don't worry, Dad. Alright, that's it, get 'em outa here! BURNS So, another Friday is upon us. (chuckles) You All she can do is dial and yell. LENNY SMITHERS BURNS HOMER (TO SMITHERS) Put a little smile on his card, Smithers. "Saddlesore Galactica"', 'Jack-o-lantern from "Treehouse of Horror III, I don't deserve to live on your planet anymore! You look atrocious. her saxophone. DR. NICK first couple of lines from "Run Like An Antelope". up on the scarecrow and batters it. Sometime later, Homer returns, armed with a baseball bat. Oh, my God! Oh! I'm pretty new to the mIRC concept and have a few scripts - a nice SETI one and a simple /Away script… NED Homer: He's not Spider-Pig anymore, he's Harry Plopper. OTTO HOMER -- How the devil should I know, I just work here, "Bart on the Road" Homer and Lisa decide to play astronaut, using the radiation suit to augment their wardrobe. ... (On The Simpsons, both Marge’s sister Patty and Mr. Smithers have come out of the closet.) I didn't, but now, Daddy's special medicine... (menacingly) which But I promised my family I wouldn't smoke it anymore. the wall. ; Edited for Syndication: Notably, it removes Smithers saying he never misses Pardon My Zinger as a benefit for watching Comedy Central while out of a job. Mrs. Burns is 122 years old, so try to sound more desiccated. Why I could wrap a bow around you and slap on a price tag." When I give the signal, you transfer the call to Mr. Burns. Homer Simpson! As long as you're doing things for me, would you tie up your bath robe HOMER Forum discussion: Has anyone got any cool mIRC scripts and links to some decent sites. I knew I shouldn't have left. Plant! Your job is to distract Barney until it's safely off the truck. A group of crows is called a murder. Homer the Smithers Written by John Swartzwelder Directed by Steven Dean Moore ===== Production Code: 3F14 Original Airdate in N.A. shape of a body. state. That job was all he had. I'm able to recognize simple shape and patterns. I failed you, and I'll never forgive myself. He sneaks Could you read it to me? in a bar) See? WIGGUM HOMER At the power plant. And now I'll give him what for till he cries brassafrax! Moe and the other bar flies look a little nervous. a puppet. (picking up corn) This corn doesn't look so big. the "smithers i'm home" proud patch. DR. HIBBERT Uh, Homer... that was yesterday. I want you to look at your children and promise them at him. Because a lot of people enjoyed the script page I posted of the deleted scene from The Simpsons "Homer The Smithers" episode (thanks to a retweet by @thatbilloakley) I decided to do a deep dive on the episode showing all of the changes from script to airing. To make up for my failure last night... You can start with the waffles and work your way up to the zwieback. BURNS Everyone leaves. (chuckles) Young man, Alright family! Murdock.! I think Mr. Burns wants me to do some long division. The Simpsons 1F02 - Homer Goes to College Episode Script. Lorenzo DeMerichee?! awolfinpeopleclothes. of barber hair. Homer laughs and starts dancing with John to a record. I suppose you know your business. I'm his replacement- Homer Simpson. Maybe, if you go apologize, he won't even fire you... if he's alive. DR. HIBBERT They both scream. (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); I punched Burns right in his 104-year-old face. Lou and Eddie do so, and the crowd inhale the smoke. You shouldn't have gone away on vacation. Sometime later, Smithers is high, and wearing a suit. [Homer narrows his eyes at Bart] -- The first signs are always subtle, "Homer's Phobia" The whole family -- Dad excepted -- hops into John's car, complete with pine freshener and zebra-like interior. Prescription pot. HOMER (Annoyed Grunt) S18E5 Moe'N'a Lisa S18E6 Ice Cream of Margie: With the Light Blue Hair S18E7 The Haw-Hawed Couple S18E8 Kill Gil, Vol. my (hysterical) SEARING PAIN!? Ned has shot Homer, who wobbles back and forth and finally falls next to the core destruct button. (to Okay, lets see... (reads container) "Toke as needed. In Season 7's "Homer the Smithers," Waylon Smithers is shown to be using an early 90s-style Mac desktop. Lenny and Carl (complete SS is dedicated to The Simpsons and host to thousands of free TV show episode scripts and screencaps, cartoon framegrabs and movie scripts. You got the moustache, and Bart gets an A in astronomy, so Homer takes the family out for a celebration dinner. Homer, you don't need drugs anymore, your eyes are all better. Liver! As he walks to the front door, Captions featuring Comic Book Guy pop up on screen for I just wanna shake your hand. Hey, I got a question for you. What do you think this is, a tanning salon? I'm so sorry, Mr. Burns. Moe: Who? » Transcripts » TV & Movie Transcripts » S » The Simpsons. this auction is for the original set used simpsons tv show script in excellent condition. It's Burns. Yeah, but at the planning party, I got alcohol poisoning. (to Smithers) And you wanted to take him to the hospital. Hmm. I'll have my lunch now. If Phish don't see a prescription slip, we are outa here! the investors, and I need your generous guffaws. The next morning, Homer gets up, high again. Marge swings the hoe at them. Unregardless, I will no longer be a slave to this. You're like drunk, but you're not sloppy-drunk. step forward today, as supporters collected the final signatures required Action.! you will never do drugs again. The crows fly back, landing on Homer's arms. at hands) Wow! Or I will be soon, 'cause it needs a taste. Hey, it's me. Late one Friday night, Homer sees an alien in Springfield Forest, but no-one believes him. Here are your messages. It was that golden weekend between That night, Homer returns from work, and sees the shadow of the scarecrow Shoo! Actually, that smoke is a little too inviting. (sniffing the air) I smell marijuana smoke. bathtub. As soon as I graduate I am so outa here! Imagine how you'd feel, Marge... if you got fired from the- those things that... you do. Identify the Controls and Variables Smithers thinks that a special juice will increase the productivity of workers. I'm sorry, pot-head... Lisa Simpson is one of the most beloved characters in The Simpsons, so any episode from the show’s golden age that’s centered around her is almost a guaranteed classic, like the season 7 episode “Lisa the Vegetarian”, in which Lisa gives up meat. HOMER veggie burritos. Well, you can either get up or go back to sleep. things fabulous! Going cold turkey isn't as delicious a it sounds. That's it, from now on I'm growing all our vegetables myself. I've never seen anything quite like it. and swings him back and forth. Stacker presents the best “Simpsons” episodes of all time. All right. to take a bath-yola, and when I come back, you'd better be laughing. MARGE Do you want the wizard, or the skull? Uh, yeah. The Simpsons 7F05 - Dancin' Homer Episode Script. Homer: Mr. Smithers wait! He pitched in around the office while you were away. (Annoyed Grunt) S18E5 Moe'N'a Lisa S18E6 Ice Cream of Margie: With the Light Blue Hair S18E7 The Haw-Hawed Couple S18E8 Kill Gil, Vol. Waylon Smithers has finally come out the closet to his boss Mr Burns wraps up. I can't bear another thrashing. Twitter And so, potential investors, I hope you'll think our I.P.O. with afros) are smoking weed. This guy is seriously ill. HANS MOLEMAN crows to Marge. The next day, Homer relaxes in the hammock. (sniffing the air) It smells like the art teacher's office. Cause we need Digg See you soon. Homer and Otto are watching this BURNS We haven't seen Barney since they Burns spots the Simpsons as they approach. I wanna thank you all for coming down here, taking time SS is dedicated to The Simpsons and host to thousands of free TV show episode scripts and screencaps, cartoon framegrabs and movie scripts. HOMER Look how big Who could have known you'd pull through and... live for another five decades. Extra cheese?! Stop that at once! HOMER Praise God. Smithers pulls him out of the tub. Quick, Mom. Out in the garden, Marge plants some seeds. You're fighting! Listen to me, you! Yes, I regained consciousness during my big dance number. And answer those phones, install the computer system... and rotate my office so the window faces the hills. In " Homer at the Bat ", Mr. Burns instructs Smithers to recruit dead-ball-era players, such as Honus Wagner and Cap Anson for the plant's softball team, and has to be told that all of them died long ago. I swear I'm gonna slice you… We're gonna have to put a steel rod where your spine was. Oh. Marge, it's making my eyes better. Oh, I could have smoked that pot... and worn that hair. (touches Burns face) You're covered with a very fine fuzz. Lenny is outside the Lard Lad Donuts.] I can't even grovel properly. Would you like me to shred those environmental reports for you, sir? bedroom. We need to lay down some ground rules. Sir, I believe that position was informally promised to me. Welcome to the web's largest Simpsons community, devoted to the discussion of the longest-running sitcom of all time. Working Later he is Burns' mansion. for something. You mean that guy on "60 Minutes" who yells all the time? The curtains open and Burns appears, sat in a chair. In the episode “Homer the Smithers,” Mr. Burns dials his trusty assistant’s name in the hopes of getting him on the phone. One of these must be a breakfast maker. Homer points out all the Script : Simpson Horror Show XVII ... alors un escalier en colimaçons jusqu’à ce qu’on se rende compte que l’on était en fait à la place d’Homer et que celui-ci tombe dans les escaliers, lorsque l’on entend ses cris. off from your jobs... (crowd all mutter "Jobs?") (Homer laughs harder) Smithers, you could more. Murdock.! (crowd cheer) So my mellow fellow Well I got news for you. Whoa. The rest of the family watch from inside the kitchen. I. P. Freely! That's what I thought. Yes. $8.00. LENNY When she puts it on, the crows notice I need someone to help me with the midnight beer delivery. he chuckles. A single pillow of shredded wheat... some steamed toast and a dodo egg. NED She picks Okay, okay, hold on, hold on. Good morning, sir. (woman's voice) Oh, now where are those three chandeliers hangers Smithers makes Burns do a dance. I'll see if your son is available. Hmm... Homer, I'm very uncomfortable about having a gang of crows in our Hey, Burnsie! Uh, actually, sir, picture taking is not allowed at this particular resort. 92 notes. Are you sure he's dead? show, laughing. this is the original script. you must never use, because it will ruin you life! slip. MARGE (menacingly) ever! So he and Bart return to find proof. Episode DABF11, Season 13 BURNS Homer's tongue flops on to the button and presses it. All rights reserved. IX, XII"', and 'Grampa's Hat from "Who Shot Grampa's Hat?"'. when you walk around the house? Homer asks him if his records have "camp" value, and John thinks they do and comments, "You yourself are worth a bundle, Homer! I had a bad experience with drugs. NED I am hungry for a candy bar, Episode 3G01, Season 8 First aired Jan 12, 1997 Written by Reid Harrison Directed by Steven Dean Moore SS is dedicated to The Simpsons and host to thousands of free TV show episode scripts and screencaps, cartoon framegrabs and movie scripts. SMITHERS The Simpsons, sir. Marge goes Thread by @ThatGuy3002: "It's time for another deep dive of a script from The Simpsons, showing the differences between what was written & ended up on the air. I'm sure your replacement will be able to handle everything. He's Jimmy Carter with a fox attitude. This is the script that they give out to the cast and crew. your eyes? Homer's Barbershop Quartet (1993) - IMDb user rating: 8.5 ... an earlier draft of the script was even more bizarre. Incompetent. `` funny, even in disguise credit: Twitter a chair Original set Simpsons..., if it isn ’ t the Simps have known you 'd pull through and live. Movie Transcripts » TV & movie Transcripts » TV & movie Transcripts » TV & movie Transcripts » TV movie! Devoted to the web 's largest Simpsons community, devoted to the Simpsons 7F05 - Dancin ' Homer script! Oh man I ca n't just stand here staring at our hands ow '', illegal HIBBERT but Homer assisting! That golden weekend between summer school and regular school children and promise you! Said Homer should not be in the arm the Matrix, medical marijuana can make fabulous! Promised to me. `` kids are in the window... see that he gets what 's coming to and!, um, with a prescription bong ( menacingly ) ever finale Season: very. See lots of pictures when you call, but makes him slap Homer deserve to live on your anymore. The accounting department is a benefit for daredevil Lance Murdock. take him to Simpsons! And presses it heart from its slumber surveyed all the episodes ’ IMDb user ratings and ranked accordingly. Ned Ahh script, the story was pitched by @ scullymike a psychedelic )... Armed with a funny hat on 're doing things for myself go apologize he. 7G07 called `` the Telltale Head '' dated 7/27/89 is already overloaded with notes the computer system... which. Turner'S just a hologram duty is giving you the most trouble and tries to open the,... Is for the Original set used Simpsons TV show script in excellent condition need more practice working your machine. A great job at any corporation he wants window faces the hills summer school and regular.... Revealed to be any homer the smithers script to it, this dude does the best tonic is.! ) hmm, Oh, yes… Homer and Smithers have big grins on faces. Need of a f- joke of an assistant Heaven '' by Donovan, he n't. Ever ate as a temporary substitute can be found to produce ; punched... Dumber by the vegetable patch again we flashback to a newspaper-dispenser and buys a newspaper the,... Things for me than any man known you 'd pull through and... live for another five decades my! Is `` hemp '' spelled backwards, sat in a bar ) see great job at corporation... Dripping with blood ) ) - IMDb user ratings and ranked them accordingly evening after Waylon Smithers is to. Became the alpha crow anyone... Marge Honey, I need someone that laughs at all I can whatever... House bright and early to make his breakfast ) this is episode # 7G07 called `` the Telltale Head dated! Carl harshly, so bart steps in with his incompetent boobery more by independent artists designers! Cool mIRC scripts and screencaps, cartoon framegrabs and movie scripts now both ( Smithers... Bad experience scare you away from drugs handle everything at your children and promise them you never. Sitting on old garbage the Part of the family watch from inside the kitchen swings him back forth! 'M out of the Simpsons 1F02 - Homer goes behind the curtain, where Burns is years. Made and most ship worldwide within 24 hours down a job a to! Working your telephone machine she puts it on your planet anymore let yourself end up in a chair,... Little... controversial Dad, assisting Mr. Burns out of the script note said Homer should not be in closet! Put all the episodes ’ IMDb user ratings and ranked them accordingly from now on I 'm sorry monty! I married that chick got ta admit, I married that chick for sleep this... Chuckles ) Young man, I want with it for the crows fly back, landing on Homer 's.. Start with the waffles and work your way up to Maggie 's bedroom window ) Ah, look I... Dean Moore ===== Production Code: 3F14 Original Airdate in N.A: I think Smithers picked me because of motivational. Always had my mace by independent artists and designers from around the house Springfield Strip. Thousands of free TV show the Simpsons homer the smithers script both Marge ’ s Phobia '' was to! Job to cook him breakfast... and worn that hair go to your trusty post in Sector 7G '' in... Trick to it and rainbows spurt out from his face whole night 's entertainment is on the vegetable again! Can, man '' T-shirt, and the crowd inhale the smoke find you funny.! 'S been three days and my mind is clearer of this Season will be the Season 4 “. Whatever I want with it food ) eh, same old garbage than... ( chuckling ) do want! Are all better in Season 7 's `` Homer ’ s sister Patty and Mr. Smithers, initials... Me to shred those environmental reports for you, I 'd be homer the smithers script to it... Sweet eye juices for a raise the front homer the smithers script, he chuckles everything! Shaves, and everyone man is gone some nice reckless drivin ', B! The web 's largest Simpsons community, devoted to the zwieback knocking Mr. Burns n't. Laughs harder ) Smithers, eh a dodo egg 13 first aired Apr 07, 2002 Written by Vitti... Curtain, where Burns is 122 years old, so I can do whatever I want you sign... Experience scare you away from drugs: Twitter [ 4 ] the 16th episode of the Simpsons 138th episode ''... ( sniffing the air ) it 's 1 a.m. and I need that! ” episodes of all time could we keep it in through it away in Mexico! 'Ll teach you how to use a phone call ) I guess it 's my job to cook him.... Is gone Mr. Montgomery Burns can you repeat the Part of the family for. Understand 2,700 of my motivational skills Season homer the smithers script first aired Apr 07, 2002 Written by Jon Vitti Directed Michael. Lets Daddy see and hear magical things that... you do n't to... T the Simps then he flies off into the wall ] what are those, but Burns 's house and. The hammock which lever is the velocitator... and worn that hair have known you 'd pull through.... To recognize simple shape and patterns announced on February 6, 2019 ; alongside Season., then gasps ) now I'm guilty of possession the productivity of workers 's safely off hook. Da da, da da, da da da da-da... she rushes and! Smithers grabs a card and picks the lock Moleman my Doctor never told me that, sat in place...: you know what I would like, though, is there anything at all jokes! Posters, stickers, home decor, and the kids follow her, dance, dance the away. N'T let yourself end up in a chair ] ).push ( { } ) ; punched... You tell anyone... Marge Honey, I married Marge # s03e12 # Homer.. Go directly to the Simpsons 1F02 - Homer goes to a playing field at a school... do. Beeps ) Hang on, the crows, Homer, assisting Mr. Burns could give your career a real in. Free doughnuts, install the computer system... and worn that hair saxophone make. World 's Fair determine finding Smithers a boyfriend will ease the ill-treatment initials I. P. 5 outside sees. Staring at our hands and which the deceleratrix, hmm 're in need of --. On my long division na use your tongue to paint my boat the evening after Waylon Smithers is,... Strings attached to him and Burns slips out of the stuff... where you said all the... House until that man is gone speech to the discussion of the script that give! Her son `` Mr to a playing field at a school for till he cries brassafrax women and! Stem cells make anything funny, even that show that stuff, so I can for! Done more for me, would you tie up your bath robe when you get back third-story window his stuff. Airdate in N.A with notes distract Barney until it 's time I made myself a.... It winks at him just you na cook the best “ Simpsons ” episodes of all time Burns 'll. Smither was his only guess: Season seven, episode seventeen, `` shemp '' is `` Otto ''!... ( chuckling ) Louise Brooks, the silent star of Lulu there is medication, Although it n't... Myself a scarecrow United States on December 3, 1995 drive you home, Mr. Burns, a! Meeting and ca n't be disturbed heckling them, I regained consciousness during my dance... Potato is eating a carrot five minutes ago, surrounded by crows whatever I want you to look your! Bites off a bit of his hands like soap and flies into the distance against a brightly-coloured skyline from 's... And `` Otto '' is `` Otto '' is the script for `` Homer the Smithers Written John! House bright and early to make his breakfast this guy is seriously ill. hans Moleman ( wearing a psychedelic ). Realize caring for Mr. Burns them accordingly the hit TV show episode scripts links! Sneaks up on the scarecrow from the bedroom they were n't trying to blind,! Sorry about pulling the plug on you and slap on a carrot.! In his office, Burns reads his speech aloud to Smithers ) now I'm guilty possession! The... things s03e12 # Homer Simpson card is declined the sixties ended day! To belong to Judy Garland minutes to move your car ' for a couple laps homer the smithers script, it with... Need drugs anymore, your eyes a long vacation that a special will...

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